Dear Jellybean,
I want to apologize for not talking to you more before now. To be honest, I was protecting myself. It was hard to hope that you were really in there and doing well. But today, you showed me. You not only flipped around and waved your arms, but you showed the ultrasound tech a little attitude. When they tried to go back for more views, you laid on your tummy and took a snooze, refusing to move. When she did finally get you to move, you laid on you side, refusing to budge so she could see what she needed. You are so like your sister! Not surprisingly, you are tall, already blowing the curve at 13 cm (5+ inches) when pregnancy charts tell me you should only be 3 inches.
Seeing you today was amazing. Don't get me wrong, seeing your heartbeat at the 6 and 8 week ultrasounds was incredible, as was hearing your heartbeat earlier this week. But seeing you, looking like a little person, with a cute nose in profile and little limbs waving around, showing so much personality already, it made you real. Really real. I know you're in there. Listening. Learning the voices of your world--me, daddy, and Lil' Bit. So, here's my promise to you--I'm going to try to remember to talk with you at least once a day. Tell you what's going on out here as we get ready for you. Tell you stories about me, daddy, and Lil' Bit.
This pregnancy has been harder on me than your sister's was, but that isn't your fault. I need to remember to take joy in our time together. All too soon, I will have to share you with the world. Until then, I will do my best to make the most of our time. I will do what I can to make us both healthy. And, hey, the upside of the high risk pregnancy is an ultrasound roughly every 4 weeks, so we'll see you again soon. Until then, I love you, my jellybean. Whoever you are. I can't wait to see who that is.
Love,
Mommy
