Taking the Plunge

The other evening I found myself extremely tired, having been worn down by a screaming child who was clearly tired, but refused to go to sleep.  Having set her in her crib and disappeared downstairs where the wailing was only partially ear-splitting, I curled up on the sofa and wondered why I ever thought this was a good idea and whether I should reconsider having another.  I thought to myself, maybe it's a good idea we didn't dive in just yet.  My mind then went off on a tangent, as it is wont to do, about all of the swimming metaphors there are for making decisions--diving in, jumping in, taking the plunge, getting in over your head.  And I realized all of these metaphors had something in common that I had never noticed.  They all allude to the fact that, at some point, making this decision will take you to a place where you aren't grounded.  Either your head is above-water but you aren't on solid footing, or you can touch the ground but you're underwater and could be drowning.  Whether the decision is to get married, buy a house, go to college, have a child, move to a new place, whatever.  When making these decisions, you have to take a leap, put yourself in a position where you are off-balance, tread water while you figure out what to do, and then sink or swim.  Each of these events involve a huge learning curve and there is simply no way to be prepared for everything.  It's quite frightening to look out as you tread water and feel like you are all alone in the middle of a vast ocean of unknown as your body begins to tire and you don't know how much longer you can hold out.  But chances are, there is a life raft or flotation device nearby.  What you need is friends and family to buoy your spirits.  Get some advice, some perspective, or just reconnect.  Finding out that everyone else is simply smiling while they tread water, not speeding past you on a yacht as it at first appeared, makes things so much easier.  I am quickly learning that the more I ask advice of those who have been there, the less my head will hurt from banging it into a wall.  Knowing that I have people I can go to for support makes the idea of taking the plunge and having another child easier to imagine.  And hey, isn't all this metaphorical treading water making my legs stronger? So, I should be better prepared for next time, right? :)