Having waited, talked, prayed, and listened, the long and short of it is, we paid our deposit and we're on the calendar for another FET in February. Given the general timing of things, it looks like we're probably talking mid-February, which means making sure to miss Ash Wednesday since it falls nice and early on the 13th this coming year. Other than that, I'm trying to do my best not to calculate or plan anything and just go with the flow.
I'm also trying to let 2013 be a new year, with new hopes and dreams; trying to leave my fears and disappointments from the failed FETs behind. But, it's hard not to think about Oliver, since he was a February FET, too. In fact, because of that, I was pretty conflicted about doing another February FET. However, the plan was to follow the guidance we received, and that guidance said February. So, emotional conflict or not, February it is, with shots starting sometime next month.
With that said, I don't know yet how much of the process I'll blog. I'm just not sure what there is to say that I haven't already said. I've already documented all the conflict, the excitement, the great roller coaster of hormones and emotions, the hope of success, the fear of failure. I've already learned I'm tough enough to do this. I already know how hard it is and how wonderful it is to have support. I've already explored success, loss, and complete failure. What I haven't explored yet is privacy. I'm wondering what it's like to keep more of the process intimate and personal and not share as much.
In that vein, I'm interested in your thoughts, dear readers. Do you want to come along again, or are you just as happy waiting for the big reveal? Although I write for myself, I have been told that others have found my blog helpful. So, tell me, is it helpful getting the day-to-day stuff, even if some of it is repetitive? What do you find interesting? What do you want to hear about?
In any event, for now, I'm still sharing. And what we have to share is this: We're trying again in February. Here goes everything.