Paying for Stitch

Lil' Bit has begun to want to help around the house.  Whether it's taking groceries out of the bag and handing them to me to put away, or shutting the refrigerator door, even though I'm still in it, she's figured out that these are things big people do and, therefore, she needs to do them, too.

Now, some of you may remember the song from Free To Be You & Me about helping.  It includes these two, very wise lines:

Some kinds of help, are the kind of help, that helping's all about.
And some kinds of help, are the kind of help, we all can do without.

There are days that Lil' Bit's helping feels more like the latter, than the former.  But, looking at the grin on her face when she's accomplished something--like shutting the dishwasher all by herself--and it's totally worth it. There have been a few times, however, when I have done the task myself--like closing the dishwasher--without letting her do it.  She will fuss until it has been undone so she can do it.  Around our house, moments like these have become known as "paying for Stitch."

In the movie Lilo & Stitch, there is a brilliantly funny scene where Lilo and her sister are at the pound picking out a dog.  After Lilo has selected Stitch and it's time to pay, her sister begins to hand the money to the woman.  Lilo shouts something like "I want to buy him."  Her sister takes the money back and hands it to Lilo, who then hands it back to her sister, who hands it back to the woman.  Thus, in Lilo's mind, she has paid for Stitch.

Turns out, this is STB - standard toddler behavior.  If I try to toss socks in the laundry bin, I might find I have to take them back out so Lil' Bit can be the one to throw them in.  Closed the dishwasher?  Have to open it up so she can close it.  Put a book back on the shelf?  Take it back down and give it to her to put back up.  Folded a shirt?  Unfold it so she can try.  Turned off a light?  Have to turn it back on so she can do it.  You get the idea.  We have also discovered that there is no end to these "paying for Stitch" moments, and I never know I've found a new one until it happens.  Things I was allowed to do yesterday, today are things only she is allowed to do.  It's frustrating and time consuming on occasion.  But, looking at it from her perspective, she's learning to control her environment and figure out how things happen.  So, when we hit upon another such task, we look at each other, likely with much the same expression as Lilo's sister wore, and let Lil' Bit "pay for Stitch."  After all, someday, she'll be a teenager and she won't want to do anything.  Best to enjoy it while it lasts.